Thursday, August 21, 2014

while it lasts

Last night at dinner, John asked if I was sure we done having children because Evie would LOVE a playmate. I assured him- YES we are done with babies. We have four pretty amazing kids. Two of which will be leaving the nest soon. And four short years later we will only have one child at home...which we've never experienced before. I am looking forward to our life together as empty nesters, weddings and grandchildren. If things had happened differently- timing, spacing, etc...I would have loved to have had 6 or 7 kiddos running around. But it's just not the way it worked out. All of which is quite surprising because I never wanted kids growing up. When I was younger my friends would play with baby dolls and later talk about how many kids they'd have. My friend Kristina always said 8 and she is expecting  baby #7 in October. I wanted nothing to do with them. But thank goodness for happy accidents because I'm so blessed with the ones we have. Mostly because of the twins, they completely changed my perspective on having kids...for the better. On all my subsequent pregnancies, I secretly hoped for twins! Wouldn't that have been fun!?

Anyway, I'm content where we are in life. I don't think that motherly urge you get while holding a newborn or lovingly squeezing a baby ever goes away. Mine hasn't. I have friends who are having babies and I sometimes think....ooooohhhhh I want one! But my heart and mind know it's time for the next stage in life. It's a difficult decision for a mom to make, but I'm ready!

For now, I'm just enjoying it all while it lasts. From the big things like dances, conferences and concerts to the little moments like last night. Evie and I spent about an hour last night hanging out in the back yard. I pushed her on the swing. We collected acorns. We walked around the yard identifying flowers and plants.

So much of life is a collection of the little things.

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